believe

I don't believe in love today. It's just a constant walk into dead end walls like in a maze. This maze has no way out though. Always looking for it. Sometimes you walk longer before you hit the wall, but, the wall is always there. It always comes. Always just around the next corner. Do the wrong thing (make the wrong turn) and you hit it. I hate love. I hate chasing it. I hate wanting it. I hate not having it or being able to find it. Maybe I'm not as good of a person as I think I am. Maybe that's why I don't have anyone to watch movies with, play scrabble with, laugh with, hold, talk to. Someone out there wants me. But I'm not in love with them. I hate that I'm not in love with the one person that seems to want me. I hate that I fall in love with people that don't want me. I hate that I can't touch her, hold her, kiss her, laugh in the same room as her. Love. It's fucking great. Further attempts to.... Bye for now. Got ^.